Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Relocating with small children

My daughter is in 5th grade. I was just realizing that she has attended 8 different elementary and preschools in her short life. I guess you could say we have done our share of moving around. Some of these schools she attended for up to 2 years, others just a few months. We are now settled for at least a few years. While I would not recommend this kind of constant relocation for young children, circumstances beyond your control might force you to move your children around from school to school more than you want to.

I have 4 young children and because of school and work, we have done our share of moving in our first 12 years of marriage. There are ways that you can ease the stress and anxiety for your children. My children actually have loved everywhere we have lived and they enjoy the opportunity we've had to see and live in so many different areas and witness other cultures first hand. If you find yourself needing to prepare for a move, here are some helpful tips to keep in mind as you are making preparations.

  • Your young children will pick up on any feelings (hidden or not) that you might have about the move. Your enthusiasm will be contagious. You have to prepare yourself and look for the positive in this move.
  • Get online and see what fun things there are to do in your new town. (before the move.) Talk about ideas with your children and sit down as a family and make plans with the information you have found on your new hometown. Maybe make a list of the nearby places you want to visit within the first year of living in the new city. Children's Museums, Zoos, Aquariums, Parks, Beaches, nearby water parks or theme parks. Listen to the individual interests of each family member and make sure everyone gets to contribute. Show them pictures online. Take this opportunity to set some goals for making family time a priority with this new move and plan to make some fun memories together in and near your new hometown.
  • Do some research on the wildlife and talk about what you expect to discover. My kids were thrilled when they saw their first firefly. (So was I).
  • Let your children help you search for housing online. I know that looking at houses online is not ideal because it is hard to get the full picture, but it is exciting to initially see what is out there and in your price range. Children might enjoy looking at some virtual tours and dreaming of their new bedroom, toy room or backyard.
  • Let them assist in researching schools. I am a big believer in finding a good school for my kids. I will definately choose a home depending on the school district. (This may be why we have moved schools so much. It took me till this year to find the school we all love!)
  • Depending on the age of your children, they might be interested in researching local shopping and restaurant venues.
  • Try to assure your children that you will come back and visit friends and family as often as you can reasonably commit to. Set a time frame if possible for the next trip back to visit those you are leaving behind.

I absolutely love moving. I don't know what it is with me, but I love seeing new places and the excitement at moving to a new home. Luckily for me, my children have inherited my love for traveling and living other places. I am sure as they grow older I will get more resistance, but so far we have loved all the cities we have lived in and the countries we've been able to live in or visit. If you find yourself moving, the key is to be enthusiastic and if you don't feel enthusiastic, find some thing(s) to be excited about and try to make it an exciting time for your family. There is so much children can learn from moving and making those adjustments. Help them understand how these transitions can help them to become stronger and see things from a larger view. Validate their concerns, but help them understand that your family will grow stronger through this move and that they will meet people and have experiences that will help them become a stronger individual.